I’m finally back at my room writing this blog entry! Amen as his grace fill the hearts of his people. Derrick went back home, Yan Wai having fun backpacking starting from Melaka and be back to campus on Monday. The rest of the team, me, Kin Lee and Chee Yen will stay back here in campus for the merdeka holidays.

The competition ended with a mix feeling as there was a lot of unexpected result. Feeling of injustice on the judge’s result and decisions was questioned. A bridge is suppose to be a whole structure but end but is this team we called the “transformer” (which mean it has an main structure and a decoration structure which can be separated in the testing period) team that took the top spots of the competition. USM KKJ only won the multimedia category. It was a very sad thing to accept by most of the participants there not just from our university. But we manage to win back some experience and most of all knowing out team member better.

In the whole event our team manage to make friends with people from UTP (Universiti Teknologi Petonas). They are really good lo…. As they are those really eligible student that got a place in that university. Mind me, I’ve made two trial to get into the university. One is after SPM and the second was after matriculation. And it’s not easy to get in. nice knowing them!!

The bus ride home to campus took us around 11 to 12 hours. It is a long journey but mist important we reach campus safely.

I can say this competition has not passed us by without gaining anything. It’s a crazy world out there. In this world keeping to the rule may make your team loose this competition has gave me a glance into the world that I’m getting into after my academic years end. But which side should I stand? Ah~ha!! That is the answer I struggle often even the obvious answer is “no, keep to the rule”. God has shown me a lot of thing there and I thank Him for that!!

Amen

I’m now blogging from UTM.. for your information God has been really great to us. I mean to us all from USM. Ya, before I forget I’m here in UTM to participate in the National Bridge Competition. we have been in this for the past 2weeks. We skip class, sleep very late, and of cause at time fight over some decision on the bridge model. Me, Derrick, Chee Yen, Kin Lee and Yan Wai are in the team which we named it Civilians (can’t believe we are named it so).

Thanks got for the creation of wifi in UTM, I’m able to blog. We just finish testing the deflection of our bridge. With the early set backs which we broke our bridge, we manage to complete the test which we hang a 5Kg for 30sec without failing!

Continue tomorrow!! yeah!!!

Aman!!

Past weekend was our uni’s covo week… I went to KKJ’s convo which was on Saturday. Rushed to Main campus after Time Out..

Chaos was the word to describe the moment then. As friends, family with their toddlers running around, some of the hip onto their fathers shoulder to take a look at their close ones. As they look on I wonder what they are thinking of then? Some of them cried, some of them even taking their nap. While the small ones do their stuff, the big one holds on to their mobile phone. Some talk aloud some just did speak a word as they wait anxiously for the person on the other hand to pick up. For the girls in the crowd, one could see a wave of fanning of the paper “kipas” with varieties of colour. For those who are wiser, they make their way to the side to rest their lag. Photographers armed with their equipment and their sturdy finger ready to shoot stand by the side as to wait upon the exit of the newly graduates from the main hall after the receiving of the graduation slip. As some photographer wait on, some click on to capture the moment around them. Guards watch over, as to keep things safe and in check. Cars for the VIPs queue back to back and stand by to go when ever they are asked.

As the undergraduates stepped out from the hall, joy and laughter can be felt from their expression. The pain that they went through in their years of studies paid off. WE HAVE MADE IT! In their hearts they shout. In the picture, they were no room for tears among them that my eyes could see. Only laughter, smiles, joy and happiness covered it all.

We laugh, made jokes with our graduate seniors, asking how their life has after study, and how working life is so on so forth. The volume of our voice was at our peak as every one was excited and seeking attention from the listener, but it this chaos, our voice just sink into the background as we were not the only one there. The CF members prayed for most of out seniors that we could find among the fuss and rush of the event. Pictures were taken countless time among ourselves and the graduate seniors.

As the sky opened itself to the night, one by one the crowd leave the place. Going back with packs and packs of gift from their dear friend not forgetting the flowers and the little teddy bear on them…

After all this, I though in my heart; am I going to be like them? Am I going to experience this alone as all my friends experience this before me? What If I don’t make it? As I we were praying for the graduate seniors, I was hoping to receive the same prayer. Am I going to receive it?

I cried deep in my heart as this thought go through me. Shouting as loud as I can in me. I was feeling happy for the people around me. All the things I do I do it them. Now in this time of my life, this though of “what about me?” “myself?” and so on just sudden arise from nowhere. Making me a vegetable….

Lord I Pray this prayer unto to you and to you alone. Aman.

Beautiful

Artis : Youth Alive NSW
Album : Elevate

Verse1
All I’m I give to you
With every breath
I’ll worship you I pray
Let your will be done

Verse 2
I stand before you
My heart adores you
In your hand
I place my life I pray
Let your will be done
Chorus
Let us see on earth
The glory of your son
May I be the one
That you use in your plans

Bring the nations to your sides
Let the Kingdome join
In shouts of praise
Let me be the one who brings
The one who brings your loves

Time passes me by tick by tick…. As it flies by, it will leaves behind a train of happiness, sorrow, understanding, confusion, satisfaction, regrets and so on.

I’m really drained out now as I write out each line to you readers. Drain out as in mentally and spiritually. "Don’t give up" people say to me. Those are the words that will come out of me if I meet people who as such. It’s not as easy as it seems. It seems that a lot of things are yet to be done. But by knowing that, I do not wish to do. It’s like a computer which is overloaded with information and its doom to crash. Am I like the computer?

Today I miss the whole morning of class that is from 9am to 1pm. Am I that weak? Am I that tired? Just 3days of going to bed late. Is it worth it skipping class to gain back the energy? What would I do with the energy now? For myself? For God? Knowing that I have to keep up with my studies but what am I doing here writing this blog entry?? Will I get to study master with the result at hand? Will I even pass the grade? Am I like what was describe in the song “Grade 'A' Student” by Jason Lo?? When I grow up will I get a good job? Will I able to support my life? Today is my mum’s birthday, will I able to find a wife? Will when will I find her? What is God saying about it? As now I saw my friend which I have a crash on line listening to the song “Who Am I” by Casting Crows. Who am I?? Am I ready to tell her “I love you”? What will be the outcome of it if I tell her? Will we live happy ever after? Is she the only one? Am I being childish? Am I worshiping you? what can i do to follow you? what can i do to let myself down and follow you all my life? Can you save me? How long do i have time on earth to praise your name?

As describe in the book of Revelation. “If you have ears, listen to what the Spirit says to the churches.” Lord I’m listening...

This is the view of my room this semester.... Placing is not beside the door... So need to be discipline. this is the place where i watch movie, read books and of cause study....

I'm Loosing hope.....
but hope is what we are standing on....

How Much

Artist: Youth Alive WA Album: Shout Your Glory

You’re all I need; when I fall

I feel your hands

Your love lights my way

I’ll trust you with all my days

I’ll song forever; you gave your life always for me

Jesus you are God and you’ll reign

Nothing I could do could ever say

How much I love you

You’re all I know

You are the truth there is no one else

I’ll stand for you, for you stood for me, you set me free

I’ll sing forever, your love is everything to me

If this world should fall

And fade always

I’ll trust in you,

I’ll always say how much I love you.